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Check, please! : dating, mating, and extricating / Janice Dickinson.

By: Dickinson, Janice, 1955-.
Material type: TextTextPublisher: New York : HarperCollins, 2007Edition: First pbk. edition.Description: xxi, 264 pages : color illustrations ; 23 cm.Content type: text Media type: unmediated Carrier type: volumeISBN: 9780060834333 (pbk.) :; 0060834331 (pbk.) :.Subject(s): Dickinson, Janice, 1955- | Dating (Social customs) | Man-woman relationships | Mate selectionDDC classification: 306.73082
Item type Current location Collection Call number Copy number Status Date due Barcode Item holds
Non-Fiction Davis (Central) Library
Non-Fiction 306.73 DIC 2 Checked out 19/09/2021 12:00 AM T00557404
Total holds: 0

Enhanced descriptions from Syndetics:

<p>Supermodel Janice Dickinson's over-the-top quest for Mr. Right is a hilarious rollercoaster of famous names, outrageous stories, and vicarious thrills.</p> <p>The inimitable, outrageous Janice Dickinson--America's first supermodel and the bestselling author of No Lifeguard on Duty and Everything About Me Is Fake... And I'm Perfect--now serves up her most scintillating kiss and tell-all yet in Check, Please! Loaded with uncensored dish on her dating sagas and her stranger-than-fiction bedroom adventures, Check, Please! shows Dickinson as a real life Samantha Jones, and three decades at the top of the fast-track, glamorous world of modeling have given her a wealth of juicy stories.</p> <p>Dickinson dissects nearly 100 dates over a 25-year span--each one more jaw-droppingly outrageous than anything Jackie Collins could dream up. (There's the Big Pharma billionaire, for example, who blurts out his fantasy of having Swarovski crystals shoved in every orifice before they've finished the first course of their first date--a declaration that forces Dickinson to quickly abandon the fantasy of "free botox forever" that he'd inspired in her.) Dickinson's dates also reflect the changing times and the evolution of what she's looking for in a man. From the unfettered hedonism of the 80s, a decade spent in white-hot one night stands and steamy affairs, to her heightened desire to find Mr. Right during the 90s, to her current state of play, Check, Please! is a fun, over-the-top vicarious thrill ride--with a core that's highly relatable.</p>

Originally published: New York: Regan, 2006.

Includes index.


Table of contents provided by Syndetics

  • Foreword (p. xi)
  • Acknowledgments (p. xix)
  • Introduction (p. 1)
  • Part I Dating
  • Lesson 1 Know What Dating Is (p. 13)
  • Lesson 2 Wanna Get a Guy's Attention? Ignore Him! (p. 15)
  • Lesson 3 Broadcast It (p. 21)
  • Lesson 4 Put Yourself First (p. 25)
  • Lesson 5 How to Find a Guy (p. 26)
  • Lesson 6 The Pickup (p. 35)
  • Lesson 7 Getting Ready for Your Date (p. 42)
  • Lesson 8 Stack the Odds (p. 46)
  • Lesson 9 Late's Not Good for Very Important Dates (or Periods) (p. 52)
  • Lesson 10 First Dates Are Crucial (p. 57)
  • Lesson 11 Talk Ain't Cheap (p. 60)
  • Lesson 12 Bonus Points for Presentation (p. 63)
  • Lesson 13 If He's Got His Eye on the Door, He's Already Halfway Through It (p. 70)
  • Lesson 14 You Can Take It Seriously Without Getting Serious (p. 72)
  • Lesson 15 Sometimes, It's the Men (p. 75)
  • Lesson 16 You Set the Rules (p. 94)
  • Lesson 17 Dates Are Made to Be Broken (p. 97)
  • Lesson 18 The Phone Is Your Friend (p. 105)
  • Part II Advanced Dating Techniques
  • Lesson 19 Never Date Below Your Standards (p. 109)
  • Lesson 20 In Praise of Younger Men (p. 118)
  • Lesson 21 Take Two-They're Cheap (p. 120)
  • Lesson 22 Lack of Consideration Begs for the Check (p. 124)
  • Lesson 23 Keep It in the Closet (p. 128)
  • Lesson 24 Rules Go Out the Window with Old Flames (p. 132)
  • Lesson 25 It's Okay to Be a Parent Who Dates (p. 133)
  • Lesson 26 Nip It in the Bud If He's Mr. Nice Guy No More (p. 136)
  • Lesson 27 A Date's Great, but a Relationship Rocks (p. 141)
  • Lesson 28 Don't Do Anyone You Might Regret (p. 156)
  • Lesson 29 Go with the Flow (p. 161)
  • Lesson 30 Don't Move (In) Too Fast (p. 163)
  • Lesson 31 If You Want to Get Married, Get a Move On (p. 164)
  • Part III Mating
  • Lesson 32 Sex...It's Even Better Than Sex (p. 170)
  • Lesson 33 Men Are Not Fuck Machines, Unfortunately (p. 175)
  • Lesson 34 Size Matters (p. 177)
  • Lesson 35 Telephones Make Excellent G-Spots (p. 188)
  • Lesson 36 Homosexuality Goes Both Ways (p. 193)
  • Lesson 37 Sex Can Be Unavoidable (p. 198)
  • Lesson 38 Don't Do Kinky Shit...Unless You Want To (p. 201)
  • Part IV Extricating
  • Lesson39 Retain Mystery Down There or the Check's on You (p. 224)
  • Lesson 40 It's Okay to Want More, More, More (p. 226)
  • Lesson 41 Cheating Can Choke Out the Joy Vibe (p. 228)
  • Lesson 42 It Happens to the Best of Us (p. 234)
  • Lesson 43 Extricate Now! Ask Me How (p. 241)
  • Lesson 44 Don't Swear Off Men or Oxygen (p. 246)
  • Lesson 45 Sisters Can Do It for Themselves (p. 249)
  • Lesson 46 The End Is Not Always the End (p. 251)
  • Lesson 47 Don't Follow Trends-Start Them (p. 258)
  • Name Index (p. 261)

Excerpt provided by Syndetics

<opt> <anon I1="BLANK" I2="BLANK">Check, Please! Dating, Mating, and Extricating Chapter One Dating 101 Your Coat of Armor Before you even get to the dating part, you have to steel yourself. (Literally would help, but that metallic look is so 1981.) The first chapter can't be about what to do after your first date, because first we need to get you ready for that first date. Think of yourself as Joan of Arc. She didn't prance around in the medieval equivalent of a slinky little Versace number and stilettos, but not because she wasn't a hot-looking chick. No, Joan knew she was living through very tough and dangerous times, so she always left the house with her coat of armor. You need to wake up and realize that these are very tough and dangerous times as well. Take it from Joan -- let your guard down and you'll get burned. What you need is your own coat of armor. When Joan went into battle, she grabbed her coat. When you go out on a date, you're doing the same thing. It's like you're going into minibattle. The last thing you want is to be underdressed and unprotected. Men are tricky individuals. They are practically born with a coat of armor -- they're thick headed and hard hearted. They're warriors, and most of them have no code of honor. (Say honor to them, and most will hear "on 'er.") So you need to have your own coat of armor, too -- one that can't be penetrated until you want to be penetrated. Your coat of armor consists of the valuable information you take with you in your brain cells, because knowledge is power and power is survival; a smart plan of attack, including an RFR (Rapid-Fire Response) system, so that no matter what the guy pulls on you, you'll be ready to react; and what you choose to put on your body plus all the other little physical preparations you make for a date. This first section will give you these pieces. I promise you -- with a coat of armor this complete, you'll be immune to Cupid's harmful arrows. Your coat of armor is like safe sex before the sex even happens. Lesson One Know What Dating Is Dating Is Never Having to Say "I'm Lonely" I once was asked how I'd explain the concept of dating to space aliens. I guess the real answer is, "Is the alien single? Does he have a nice spaceship?" I do think it's useful to start a book on dating by nailing down what exactly dating is in the first place. You've gotta know what you're up against before it's up against you. Dating is one of two things. Either it's about trying to get to the next level or it's about trying to get laid. Dating and mating go hand in hand. You date, you mate. You mate, you keep the world procreating the way it's supposed to. Then, unless you stay with the same guy for eighty years and die in his arms -- which is lovely, but if that's your plan you're reading the wrong book -- the next logical step is extricating. All good -- and most bad -- things must come to an end. Dating, mating, extricating, procreating . . . masturbating. . . . I'm a white rapper. If dating is about trying to get to the next level, it makes sense that we take it so damn seriously. If we fail to get to the next level with a guy, it makes us feel like we're faulty, like we're broken people, like no man will ever have us. Dating is too important to take lightly. It's no walk in the park, though that can be a nice date if you're over sixty-five. Dating is also a test of our ability to make a connection. It gives us a window into how men see us, and if they'd like to continue to see us on a regular basis. And you were trying to pull it off without a manual? Good luck. Lesson Two Wanna Get a Guy's Attention? Ignore Him! Happy Landings My first date? I can't think back that far, to the Jurassic Era. I guess I probably arrived at the cave and the guy clubbed me, dragged me in by the hair, and had his way with me. My first real date was my prom date with Bobby back in Hollywood, Florida, when my date showed up on a Harley and I was on quaaludes and in silver lamé and blue eye shadow. Times are different. Dates are not nearly so chill. You have to play the game if you want to win. Let me give you a blow-by-blow of an experience I had with a hot pilot I met recently when I drove out to Malibu with a carful of my gay male buddies. It was supposed to be a day of walking along the beach (my favorite thing in life), looking for men (a close second), and just plain old relaxing. I didn't even want coffee -- I'm forever trying to kick caffeine, but my posse needed a fix. That's when this drop-dead gorgeous pilot cruised by on the wooden deck of the little café we'd randomly chosen. Bam! Those perfect pecs. Bam! That strong jaw! Bam! The sky-blue eyes . . . ink-black curly hair . . . worn leather bomber jacket resting on a firm, cute ass. I had to remind myself to blink. My sponsor was dangling on the other end of my cell phone (don't worry, caffeine is allowed). "I gotta go," I whispered. At that moment, I was confident that booze wasn't my problem anymore, which was a major win. But men? They were my addiction and the biggest threat to my sanity. The craving we all share for men will never change, but would we want it any other way? Oh, no. We just want to control that force of nature and make it work for us. Check, Please! Dating, Mating, and Extricating . Copyright © by Janice Dickinson. Reprinted by permission of HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved. Available now wherever books are sold. Excerpted from Check, Please!: Dating, Mating, and Extricating by Janice Dickinson All rights reserved by the original copyright owners. Excerpts are provided for display purposes only and may not be reproduced, reprinted or distributed without the written permission of the publisher.</anon> </opt>

Reviews provided by Syndetics

Publishers Weekly Review

Dickinson, the "world's first supermodel," reality TV regular ("America's Next Top Model," "Surreal Life") and author (this is her fifth book in three years), gets tiresome quickly in this memoir masquerading as a how-to. Despite having dated everybody from Bruce Willis and Mick Jagger to Warren Beatty and Sylvester Stallone, the subject at hand is Dickinson, not dating, a point foreshadowed in her "Consumer Warning": "It'll help you, I promise-but I mean help you the Janice way. I'm no hand-holder." Vacillating between bitchy tell-all and wicked know-it-all, Dickinson doesn't say much about the dating scene that hasn't been covered in a thousand different places: "Good sex is great and great sex is phenomenal, but a married man is a dealbreaker. And a heartbreaker." Funny guy Jon Lovitz's odd foreword establishes the self-obsessed pitch that carries, with little variation, through Dickinson's occasionally amusing chapters on meeting men ("The Pickup"), keeping men ("A Date's Great, but a Relationship Rocks"), juggling men ("Take Two - They're Cheap") and leaving men ("Extricate Now! Ask Me How"). If you like a good dish, that's precisely what you will get: a standard Hollywood confessional with a strident voice, a self-serving agenda and 16 pages of color photos. (June) Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.