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Kid confidence : help your child make friends, build resilience, and develop real self-esteem / Eileen Kennedy-Moore ; foreword by Michele Borba.

By: Kennedy-Moore, Eileen [author.].
Material type: materialTypeLabelBookPublisher: Oakland, CA : New Harbinger Publications, [2019]Copyright date: �2019Description: ix, 220 pages ; 23 cm.Content type: text Media type: unmediated Carrier type: volumeISBN: 9781684030491; 1684030498.Subject(s): Self-esteem in children | Self-actualization (Psychology) | Interpersonal relations | Parenting | FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS -- Children with Special Needs | FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS -- Parenting -- General | SELF-HELP -- Personal Growth -- Self-Esteem | Interpersonal relations | Parenting | Self-actualization (Psychology) | Self-esteem in childrenDDC classification: 155.4/182 Summary: "Help your child cultivate real, lasting confidence! In Kid Confidence, a licensed clinical psychologist and parenting expert offers practical, evidence-based parenting strategies to help kids foster satisfying relationships, develop competence, and make choices that fit who they are and want to become. As parents, it's heartbreaking to hear children say negative things about themselves. But as children grow older and begin thinking about the world in more complex ways, they also become more self-critical. Alarmingly, studies show that self-esteem, for many children, takes a sharp drop starting around age eight, and this decline continues into the early teen years. So, how can you turn the tide on this upsetting trend and help your child build genuine self-esteem? With this guide, you'll learn that self-esteem isn't about telling kids they're "special." It's about helping them embrace the freedom that comes with a quiet ego--away of being in the world that isn't preoccupied with self-judgment, and instead embraces a compassionate view of oneself and others that allows for both present awareness and personal growth. When kids are less focused on evaluating andcomparing themselves with others, they are freer to empathize with others, embrace learning, and connect with the values that are bigger than themselves. You'll also discover how your child's fundamental needs for connection, competence, and choice are essential for real self-esteem. Connection involves building meaningful and satisfying relationships that create a sense of belonging. Competence means building tangible skills. And choice is about being able to make decisions, figure out what matters, and choose to act in ways that are consistent with personal values. When children are able to fulfill these three basic needs, the question of "Am I good enough?" is less likely to come up. If your child is suffering from low self-esteem, you need a nuanced parenting approach. Let this book guide you as you help your child create unshakeable confidence and lasting well-being"-- Provided by publisher.Summary: "Help kids cultivate real, lasting confidence. In Kid Confidence, a clinical psychologist and parenting expert offers practical, evidence-based parenting strategies to help children build satisfying relationships, embrace personal growth, and discover the freedom that comes with a quiet ego--a deeply rooted sense of competence, confidence, and compassion for oneself and others"-- Provided by publisher.
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Enhanced descriptions from Syndetics:

Help your child cultivate real, lasting confidence! In Kid Confidence, a licensed clinical psychologist and parenting expert offers practical, evidence-based parenting strategies to help kids foster satisfying relationships, develop competence, and make choices that fit who they are and want to become. As a parent, it's heartbreaking to hear your child say negative things about themselves. But as children grow older and begin thinking about the world in more complex ways, they also become more self-critical. Alarmingly, studies show that self-esteem peaks during the preschool years, only to take a sharp nosedive as children head into their teens. So, how can you turn the tide on this upsetting trend and help your child build genuine self-esteem? With this guide, you'll learn that self-esteem isn't about telling kids they're special. It's about helping them embrace the freedom that comes with a quiet ego-a way of being in the world that isn't preoccupied with self-judgment, and instead embraces a compassionate view of oneself and others that allows for both present awareness and personal growth. When kids are less focused on evaluating and comparing themselves with others, they are freer to empathize with others, embrace learning, and connect with the values that are bigger than themselves. You'll also discover how your child's fundamental needs for connection, competence, and choice are essential for self-esteem. Connection involves building meaningful and satisfying relationships that create a sense of belonging. Competence means building tangible skills. And choice is about being able to make decisions, figure out what matters, and choose to act in ways that are consistent with personal values. When children are able to fulfill these three basic needs, the question of Am I good enough? is less likely to come up. If your child is suffering from low self-esteem, you need a nuanced parenting approach. Let this book guide you as you help your child create unshakeable confidence and lasting well-being.

"Help your child cultivate real, lasting confidence! In Kid Confidence, a licensed clinical psychologist and parenting expert offers practical, evidence-based parenting strategies to help kids foster satisfying relationships, develop competence, and make choices that fit who they are and want to become. As parents, it's heartbreaking to hear children say negative things about themselves. But as children grow older and begin thinking about the world in more complex ways, they also become more self-critical. Alarmingly, studies show that self-esteem, for many children, takes a sharp drop starting around age eight, and this decline continues into the early teen years. So, how can you turn the tide on this upsetting trend and help your child build genuine self-esteem? With this guide, you'll learn that self-esteem isn't about telling kids they're "special." It's about helping them embrace the freedom that comes with a quiet ego--away of being in the world that isn't preoccupied with self-judgment, and instead embraces a compassionate view of oneself and others that allows for both present awareness and personal growth. When kids are less focused on evaluating andcomparing themselves with others, they are freer to empathize with others, embrace learning, and connect with the values that are bigger than themselves. You'll also discover how your child's fundamental needs for connection, competence, and choice are essential for real self-esteem. Connection involves building meaningful and satisfying relationships that create a sense of belonging. Competence means building tangible skills. And choice is about being able to make decisions, figure out what matters, and choose to act in ways that are consistent with personal values. When children are able to fulfill these three basic needs, the question of "Am I good enough?" is less likely to come up. If your child is suffering from low self-esteem, you need a nuanced parenting approach. Let this book guide you as you help your child create unshakeable confidence and lasting well-being"-- Provided by publisher.

"Help kids cultivate real, lasting confidence. In Kid Confidence, a clinical psychologist and parenting expert offers practical, evidence-based parenting strategies to help children build satisfying relationships, embrace personal growth, and discover the freedom that comes with a quiet ego--a deeply rooted sense of competence, confidence, and compassion for oneself and others"-- Provided by publisher.

Includes bibliographical references.

Table of contents provided by Syndetics

  • Foreword (p. vii)
  • Part 1 Introduction
  • 1 Why Telling Our Kids They're Wonderful Doesn't Build Real Self-Esteem... and What Does (p. 2)
  • 2 How Children's Self-Esteem Changes with Age (p. 12)
  • Part 2 Connection
  • 3 "Why Are You Always Yelling at Me?": When Your Child Reacts Intensely to Parental Correction (p. 26)
  • 4 "You Love Her More!": When Your Child Struggles with Sibling Jealousy or Conflict (p. 50)
  • 5 "Nobody Likes Me!": When Your Child Feels Friendless (p. 73)
  • Part 3 Competence
  • 6 "I Can't Do It! I Quit!": When Your Child Gives Up Easily (p. 94)
  • 7 "It's Not Good Enough!": When Your Child Suffers with Harsh Self-Criticism and Perfectionism (p. 114)
  • Part 4 Choice
  • 8 "I Can't Decide!": When Your Child Feels Trapped by Indecision and Helplessness (p. 136)
  • 9 "I Don't Fit In!": When Your Child Struggles with Feeling Different (p. 154)
  • Part 5 The Bigger Picture
  • 10 Coping with Bullying, Teasing, and Other Meanness (p. 178)
  • 11 Real Self-Esteem and the joys of a Quiet Ego (p. 193)
  • Works Cited and Consulted (p. 202)

Reviews provided by Syndetics

Kirkus Book Review

A guide to increasing children's confidence and helping them realize their full potential.In this book, clinical psychologist Kennedy-Moore (What's My Child Thinking?, 2019, etc.) promises readers a wide range of practical and effective parenting strategies. But first, the author takes pains to debunk some key concepts of contemporary child-rearing philosophythe worst of which, she says, is the idea that one must compulsively and universally offer kids uninterrupted affirmation in order to build up their self-esteem. Kennedy-Moore cites recent studies that hint at the problems of such an approach, and her tone is refreshingly blunt as she does so: "self-help gurus and inspirational articles often promote the idea that we have to love ourselves to have a happy, fulfilling life," she writes. "This is nonsense." In the place of this concept, she lays out a comprehensive set of guidance tips, designed to help parents to understand their kids' needs and encourage them with direct communication and honest assessmentnot blanket assurances that everything that they do is perfect in every way. Each of the book's sections offers helpful subheadings, and a separate "Take-Home Points" graphic is designed to summarize key items from the text as a whole. Kennedy-Moore addresses the topics of making parental connections, assessing and building children's competencies, and helping kids to become more decisive and deal with bullying. Throughout, she employs a clear, concise prose style and an unfailing directness, typified in lines such as "As parents, we can't protect our children from having bad things happen to them."Kennedy-Moore has written many books on the subject of parenting and is on the advisory board of Parents magazine, and her expertise is obvious on every highly detailed page of this smart and assured manual. She buttresses each of the book's subsections, and all of its points of contention, with ready citations as well as a comprehensive 19-page bibliography. On every topic, from sibling rivalry to cyberbullying to proper hygiene, the author's tone is always staunchly realist ("Winning feels good, but it's unrealistic for any of us to believe that we will win every contest") and specifically practical ("To avoid [a] no-win battle, reach for the feelings behind the complaints, and try to tie them to a particular situation or a specific time"). Along the way, she always maintains the tone of quiet compassion that animates the book throughout. The author's focus returns again and again to her conception of children's self-esteem, which aims to anchor their sense of self-worth more solidly that other parenting guides tend to do. As a result, crucial insights abound in these pages. For instance, Kennedy-Moore acknowledges the extensive research into what many parents already knowthat children have the potential to be incredibly meanand she offers several helpful tips on countering bullying. At the same time, however, she stresses that children can also bully themselves with a pattern of self-criticism and that parents can help them to counter this tendency.A wise and realistic program for instilling genuine self-esteem in children. Copyright Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.